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I sit here divided.  I sit here too scared to make any motion that might cause hurt.  I sit here in doubt and untrust.  No one hears my cry, no one responds.  Oh Lord my God, hear my cry.  What does it mean to be free?  Am I free?  I sure seem to be chained down for a free man.  So many thoughts, so few words.  You, oh Lord, full of mercy and grace, catch me when I fall.  Catch me now, and lift me to my feet.  Speak to me, oh Lord, that I might hear You.

-anonymous author

So I watched Religulous last night.  There are a couple of things I realized while watching it.  But before I get there, lets start with a few positives.

1. This movie started some great conversations including:
   • Aliens a possibility?
   • Dinosaurs are in the Bible
   • several others
2. We also talked about salvation
   • The only thing that affects salvation is faith in Christ Jesus
   • The other stuff is there, and it’s fun to talk about, but not worth dividing or arguing over

So, obviously, now comes the not so positives I took from the movie

1. With the exception of Bill rejecting Jesus, he mostly has things right
2. Most Christians are to religious, that Jesus gets left out of the picture
   • Not one of the Christians in the documentary mentioned anything about Jesus or God loving us

I want to take just a few minutes to express what Bill got right and what he got wrong (quotes taken off of IMDB).  My hope here is that you will see that Jesus is so much more than just some religion:

Religion is dangerous because it allows human beings who don’t have all the answers to think that they do.

- True, Jesus clearly said that only the Father has all the answers.  We don’t have all the answers, so why does religion say we do?

Anyone who tells you that they know, they just know what happens when you die, I promise you, you don’t. How can I be so sure?

- Interesting statement.  but more or less agree with it.  I don’t know what is going to happen to me when I die, but I have faith that Jesus will keep His promise.

If you believe that the world is going to come to an end – and perhaps any day now – does it not drain one’s motivation to improve life on earth while we’re here?

- I’m not sure what “improve life” means, but if it’s anything like get rich, live the american dream sort of idea, then yes it does, very much so.  I can’t wait to get to heaven.  What it doesn’t drain is my motivation to keep sharing the Gospel.  Quite the oposite in fact, because there are so many who havn’t heard it.  God Loves you!

They just do it because they have always done it, and isn’t that religion for you.

- Sounds like it to me.

DIRECTIONS:
- Go to Google image search.
- Type in your answer to each question.
- Choose a picture from the first three pages.
- Use this website (http://bighugelabs.com/flickr/mosaic.php) to make your collage.
- Save the image for use in this note
- Post and tag 10 friends

QUESTIONS:
1. What is your name?
2. What is your favorite food?
3. What is your hometown?
4. What is your favorite color?
5. What is your favorite movie?
6. What is your favorite drink?
7. What is your dream vacation?
8. What is your favorite dessert?
9. What is one word to describe yourself?
10. How are you feeling right now?
11. What do you love most in the world?
12. What do you want to be when you grow up?

This was originally posted on http://sdsuintervarsity.com on January 31st, 2009

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It’s me Adam and it’s Saturday night here at Break Away 2009.  Let me tell you, Jesus is moving in this place!

I’ve been wrestling with God a lot today.  I’ve had a feeling that God was planning something big for this weekend for some time now.  The problem became apparent to me this evening that while I knew something big was going down, I was trying to make it go down according to my will and my timing (I seem to do that a lot).  Anyways, I figured I would start my day out in the prayer room, so I got up earlier than my roommates and headed down to the prayer room before they were out of bed, before breakfast.

All was well, although I admit I was a bit tired (I saw 1 or 1:30 last night, way past my bed time).  I did some morning devotion, but really couldn’t focus on anything.  So breakfast came and went (I had a Yogurt for the first time), then we headed to our electives.  I attended “Fire and Consuming Passion for the Campus” and God really was at work.  I could just sense and see the Spirit working in the hearts of all of us there.  The coolest thing was seeing those there come together at the end and we all just started praying.  It was deep and intense prayer.

After his amazing time, I headed to lunch.  I’m thankful I ran into Danny as he told me I needed to be wearing shows (which I wasn’t) in order to go into the food court area.  I went to my room and grabbed my sandals and grabbed some awesome food (thanks Cragun’s) and then headed out to the lake for some ice skating.

This is about the time I started to let that which was goign through my head get to me.  I really, really wanted to make my will God’s.  Well, I got down to the rental area, and they didn’t have any skates my size.  Bummer.  Oh well, I figure I would watch the others and take pictures and what not.  Well, they all got their skates, but my heart just wasn’t in anything.  I just wanted to cry out to Jesus.  I eventually made it to the prayer room where I found Annie and Erica rocking out with Jesus (Rieger later came in).  I sat down, but really couldn’t figure out what my problem was.  I was having difficult figure out what I was feeling, why this weekend wasn’t turning out what I thought it was going to be, why things were working out as I wanted them (I didn’t realize that this was my thoughts though, I didn’t understand).  Eventually I started talking with Annie.  When I was ready to go, and started to, she asked me to stay and work my anger out (again I didn’t realize it was anger) with God with the supplies there.  I said it wasn’t my style (it’s not), but then Rieger came in.  We talked some more and stuff, and with out much reason (other than fun), Annie asked if she could wipe her hands (which were full of chalk) on my face.  She did and Ashely joined in the fun too.

I still don’t understand it, but I found comfort and healing through it.  I don’t exactly remember what happened next, but eventually found myself watching and learning how to play a new card game.  After that we played some Cribbage.  Then supper time and I heard some awesome testimonies of how a couple of people came to know Jesus.  It was amazing to see God working in and through those conversations.  Thanks God!  But my heart started to fall back to where it was.  We went to the worship gather and chapter time, but my heart really wasn’t in it.  At the end of chapter time though, we got in groups of three.  The other two in my group prayed over me.

I tell you what, God can work fast.  Like really fast.  I went and played two hands of cribbage which was just amazing fellowship.  Then the extended worship service started.  I have very few words to describe what was going on there but I think WOW is a good one.  Everyone was going crazy and cheering and praising the Lord God Almighty.  Jumping, dancing, giving everything.  And God found me there, I was just able to surrender all my desires to him right there.  I got on my knees and just prayed for healing and confessing my sorrow for trying to take control of His will.  It was truly amazing just to fill His presence working in me and in that room.

Praise you Lord Jesus, for you are a huge God, and You have it all under control.  I am nothing, yet you love me with an intense and fiery passion.  Thank you for your gift of life, and thank you for working in my heart today.  All that I am, I surrender to you, Amen.

I leave you now with the lyrics to a song we sang tonight.  I hope the lyrics touch you like they did me.

Jesus all for Jesus
All I am and have and ever hope to be
Jesus all for Jesus
All I am and have and ever hope to be

For it’s only in Your will that I am free
For it’s only in Your will that I am free

All of my ambitions hopes and plans
I surrender these into Your hands
All of my ambitions hopes and plans
I surrender these into Your hands

For it’s only in Your will that I am free
For it’s only in Your will that I am free

God bless,
Adam